Rankings Coaches 32-17 & Week 9 Picks With Mournful Akiva

Recorded Monday afternoon before the Colts/Panthers game, this week features a mournful Akiva still recuperating from a tough Sunday. We start with the Mets’ crushing World Series loss, but Akiva quickly turns to a rant about the Jets and their coach Todd Bowles. Alex brings it back to the Mets so that he can hate on “hypocritical” Mets fans (as opposed to “good” Mets fans like Av Sinensky). Then the guys debut their NFL coach power rankings, though with a podcast so overflowing with tangents, they’ll only end up getting through the first half of the rankings.

When they reach #30 Jim Caldwell, the guys welcome Lions fan Jordan Acker back to the pod. Acker accuses the Ford family of being involved with the Kennedy assassination and swears off the Lions until the Fords sell the team. Akiva then gives the recently departed website Grantland a long epitaph, and the guys plan an upcoming Royal Rumble podcast featuring “The Fades” (as opposed to the UK garage punk band).

Back on the tangent game, Alex recalls Dr. Ed Berliner (father of Giants guest Josh Berliner) forbidding his son and house guests from reading the New York Times on Saturdays. Then the guys get on an NBA tangent, as Akiva asks Alex about the Timberwolves’ fantasy prospects. When the guys reach Todd Bowles in the coach power rankings, Akiva goes on a rant about Bowles’s struggles with clock management, which leads Alex to rant about Tracy Claeys’s disastrous clock management for the Gophers in their loss on Saturday to Michigan. Akiva questions why Alex calls himself a Minnesota alum, which leads to a tangent about Alex being a nerd taking college math classes in junior high (which itself leads to a tangent about Alex getting concussions from punk 11th graders when he was a 9th grade Canadian math nerd).

The guys finally get back to football and run through their picks for week 9 games. But having run out of time, they promise to rank coaches 16-1 next week (unless the fans demand a second podcast this week).

(A note to prospective guests: We’ve been receiving requests for guest spots; now that the World Series is over, Akiva’s life is back to normal and we’ll be back to a set recording schedule on Monday afternoons, so if you’re interested and available on a Monday afternoon, let us know.)